Ring That Bell!

Thursday 14th September - Tuesday 19th September

I AM DONE! Yesterday (Monday 18th Sept) I had my final dose of radiotherapy! Apart from friends coming over to our house for dinner on Sunday 17th, the past few days since my last blog don't seem to have any significance - only yesterday - my final radiotherapy treatment. It meant the start of a new chapter in my recovery, a chapter where, apart from my Herceptin every 3 weeks, I don't have to have any further treatment - all I have to do is concentrate on getting really well and getting through any of the 'left over' side effects of the chemo and of course the radiotherapy.
I must just mention that on Friday 15th I attended the Lymphoedema Clinic - all is well! I have no excess swelling or fluid in my left arm after the lymph nodes being taken from my left armpit. I have another check up in November. Also on Saturday I managed to go to Essex University open day - Reno and Sam had been earlier in the year when I wasn't so well, so we decided to go and have another look to give me a taste of the University that Sam hopes to get a place in - I approve!!!!
Back to Monday! - after my final treatment I had a review appointment where I was given a copy of my treatment plan and some information regarding side effects which can reach a peak 7-10 days after the last treatment. I have another appointment on 7th November by which time any side effects will have passed and the clinic will just make sure that I have no worries about anything and that any side effects have passed and healed. I was asked if I had any questions but I only had one - "Please can I ring the bell now?" "Of course! It's a must!" was the answer!
In the reception of the radiotherapy department there is a large brass bell fixed to a plaque on the wall - the bell was donated by a Karl & Shirl Barber and customers of The Railway Inn, Aldeburgh - on the side of the plaque is the following rhyme by Irve Le Moyne:-

Ring this bell

Three times well

Its toll to clearly say

My treatments done

This course is run

And I am on my way

Each radiotherapy patient gets to ring the bell after their last treatment and everyone around applauds! So I made my way into reception and.............I rang that bell! and the applause followed, I felt quite emotional as I left the department and made my way to the car.

 

So I guess that now my journey is almost done, I feel relieved, uncertain, happy, tired, elated, a bit insecure.................yes a whole range of emotions - it's been a tough year and I know I still have some recovery time to go as well as regular check up appointments. I am so grateful for all the doctors, nurses, radiotherapists, and surgeons who have made me well - they are all my heroes.  I am grateful and want to thank all my family and friends who have been on this journey with me, whose support has been so much appreciated, especially my sisters Anita and June - there have been times that I simply would not have got through if it wasn't for them and at times I wasn't the best of patients to look after - they will know what I mean! Of course words cannot express my love for Reno and Sam they are my world and my fight was for them above all. They have had so much to put up with but they have taken it all in their stride keeping me focused throughout.

 

I hope this blog may help others who find themselves in a similar situation to me.

 

So during the past 8 months 20days after diagnosis of breast cancer:-

 

I accepted it    -    I fought it with every bit of strength I had    -    and    -    I BEAT IT!!!!!

 

 

 



Almost there!

Thursday 7th September - Wednesday 13th September 2017

Today, Wednesday 13th September, I have had my 12th dose of radiotherapy - only 3 more to go and I will be done. Hoorah!!!! Having the radiotherapy has been fine but  my skin is now beginning to feel slightly tender and has a pink tinge to it! A bit like slight sunburn really. I am continuing to moisturise although I am told that if the skin starts to break down then I should stop until it heals. Apparently the worst of the side effects tends to be approx. 7-10 days after the treatment is finished - that is if it is going to get any worse! Tiredness still affects me quite badly - sometimes I feel so tired I could just cry! - but I am not going to let that happen as I think that would make me feel quite low in myself and at this stage I really should be on a high that my treatment is almost done! The good thing is that I am sleeping very well at night!
Tomorrow I am going to have some complimentary reflexology at the Macmillan Information Centre which I am very much looking forward to. Time to totally relax!! On Friday I have an appointment at the Lymphoedema clinic to help with the restriction I feel in my armpit since having a couple of lymph nodes removed when I had surgery.
So the past week has passed quite quickly including a lovely weekend when we spent some time with Reno's brother and sister in law - shame about the shower of rain but it certainly didn't dampen our day!

Oh so Tired!

Wednesday 30th August - Wednesday 6th September
Today (Wednesday 6th Sept) I had radiotherapy treatment number 7 so tomorrow I will be over half way to the treatment being finished. The past few days I have been so tired it's hard to describe! I thought that this would happen nearer the end of the treatment but apparently it can happen at any time - everyone reacts differently. I have also felt very emotional and a bit tearful but again that is, I am told, perfectly normal. Unfortunately I have also hurt my left shoulder (believe it or not, just by tying an apron behind my back!) so lying in the position which I am required to for my treatment is not easy and quite painful - my saving grace is the fact that I only have to lie still for approx. 10 mins! It feels longer than that but I try and pass the time by either singing along to the music which plays (not out loud obviously! - that would be too much for anyone to take!!!!) or by reciting nursery rhymes! Not sure where that idea came from but it works anyway!! I saw my oncologist today who has prescribed some extra strong pain relief tablets to help me get through my radiotherapy and also I have been to see a physiotherapist today to try and get some help with my shoulder as suggested by one of the nurses in the department.
The area that the radiotherapy is treating, is at the moment still looking good - the skin is still a good colour (not going red yet) and I am using a moisturiser daily as recommended. I get some 'pricking' sensations in that area but I am told that this is quite normal and is just my body repairing internally and the nerves trying to repair - bearing in mind that at the same time the radiotherapy is destroying cells that are also having to regenerate. In other words as I keep being told - there is still an awful lot going on!!! So its little wonder that sometimes I am just too tired to think let alone actually do anything! I am concentrating all my efforts on getting the radiotherapy done so that I can 'tick off' another milestone of my journey.
My last finger nail has finally come off so now we just await the toenails!
In the last week I have booked some complementary therapy (foot massage) and a place on a health and well being day as well as a place on a HOPE course in October. These things are all offered by the Cancer Information Centre at the hospital free of charge to help with coping after treatment has finished, returning to work etc. and how to look after new nails and hair, how to manage tiredness and emotions etc. Once I have attended each event and therapy I will include in my blog what they were all about and how they have helped. Should be interesting I think, and will hopefully get me meeting more people who have been affected by Cancer and sharing our experiences. I hope also that it will get me a bit more prepared for returning to work eventually!
All in all I am fine, and life is getting easier than when I was having chemotherapy so for that I am always grateful. This journey has been and is quite incredible!

Lovely Stay in Norfolk!

Tuesday 22nd August - Tuesday 29th August 2017
What a great few days we had in Norfolk! The weather was beautiful! We had the most relaxing time, and spent some of it on my uncles yacht taking in the scenery of the broads - wonderful! We spent the late afternoons and evenings reading or chatting over a glass of wine - perfect!! On the way home on Saturday 26th I took Sam to see the house where my Grandma and Grandad used to live and then we went onto the church where they are both buried. It was lovely spending a bit of time thinking back to my childhood and holidays at their house!
Sunday 27th was a good day - Reno's brother and his wife came over for dinner and a catch up! It was lovely to see them as it had been a while!
Monday was a busy day converting the smallest bedroom into a study!
Tuesday 29th August - 1st radiotherapy treatment day of 15! Woke this morning feeling very apprehensive about my first treatment. Reno came with me and once in the radiotherapy department I changed into the gown I had been given, we were called through to a consultation room where a member of the radiotherapy team went through everything with us - what to expect whilst actually being in the treatment room, what side effects may or may not (hopefully!) occur - and I was given a list of my next 14 appointment times - 9.30 am each morning! After asking if we had any questions we were once again asked to wait in the waiting room for about 10 minutes. I could feel my nerves building as I was called through to the treatment room, but, as usual, I needn't have worried because both members of the radiotherapy team who would be treating me were so kind and reassuring. First of all I laid on the 'table' and the mould that had been made when I had my CT scan was placed under my shoulders and head. Gently they helped me get into the exact position of the mould and then several measurements were checked using a laser beam, my tattooed dots and pen marks that they were adding in today!! After about 10 mins everything was set and I was asked to keep very still, the team would be leaving the room, a few more checks would be completed remotely and then the radiotherapy would be given. First of all I thought I might count to make the time pass quickly but that became boring so I then focused on a spot on the ceiling which I thought may be a money spider!! When the spot didn't move I decided to try and work out what the music was that was playing in the background!! But I was interrupted - the team were back in the room with me and it was all done and I hadn't even realised!! Not sure why but I expected to feel something.......................I didn't feel anything at all! I thanked the team saying I would see them tomorrow and went off to change ready to go home!
I am thankful that the treatment has now started because I can now put the first day of the treatment behind me and focus on the last day!
I spent the rest of today doing light chores at home before putting my feet up this evening in front of the TV!!
A quick update on my nails - I have now lost all but one of my finger nails so I can now concentrate on paying attention to the very short new ones so that they will hopefully grow healthily. However, as I guessed, my toe nails now look like they too are damaged and will also eventually come off!! Already know that this won't be as bad as losing the fingernails because I can cover them with socks put them in a shoe and hey presto! out of sight, out of mind!!...........Well that's the plan anyway!

The past week and a bit!!

Friday 11th August - Monday 21st August
The past 10 days have been once again reasonably quiet, but I did have my heart scan on Friday 11th August. I admit to feeling a little concerned about what the results would say as I have been slightly more breathless lately and when I lie down at night my chest often feels quite tight. But , anyway, the scan procedure all happened as it should and the nurse who did the scan said she would ensure the results would be with the oncology department on Monday 14th in the morning so that they could decide whether they would give the Herceptin or not.
After a fairly quiet weekend I went to have my dose of Herceptin on 14th. I had been waiting all morning for the phone to ring and for the person on the other end to say that my heart scan results had deteriorated since my previous scan and they would be unable to give me Herceptin but that hadn't happened thankfully! I was even more surprised when just before my Herceptin injection the nurse told me my heart scan results had actually improved since the last one! The reading had gone up from 55% to 61%. Hurrah!! I needn't have been concerned at all. The injection this time was quite painful and I was glad when it was over! The following morning my leg felt like I had badly pulled a muscle which caused me to limp! This only lasted a couple of days then it was fine.
On Tuesday 15th I was bitten by some kind of insect on my left arm whilst walking in the woods. I knew that I had to be careful of punctures to the skin on that arm due to a couple of lymph nodes being removed, but although the area went red to the size of about a 50p piece, and slightly warm I wasn't unduly worried as I already had an appointment for the next day, to see the doctor about extending my sick certificate.
On Wednesday 16th I went to the doctor who has given me a sick certificate until November 16th, whilst there I mentioned the bite and he gave me an antibiotic cream and told me to draw round the redness with a pen and to come back the following day if the area had got any bigger as I would need to be seen by the hospital! Fortunately the cream did the trick, the area did not increase in size and after a couple of days the bite mark had completely disappeared!
On Thursday 17th Sam and I went to the school to collect her AS Level exam results........ I am so proud of her as despite the year she has had, she has passed in all 3 of her subjects! Well Done Sam!
On Saturday 19th Reno Sam and I went to Beccles to visit some relatives who surprised us with a boat ride from Beccles to Geldeston...........inspite of a heavy shower we really did have a lovely afternoon followed by a meal at Prezzos!
Today, Monday 21st August, has been spent at home with Sam and I getting ready for a few days break in Norfolk staying with my Uncle and his partner. We are going tomorrow morning and coming back on Saturday 26th. Unfortunately Reno has to work but I expect he will enjoy the peace and quiet!!! It will be so nice to have a change of scenery and some 'chilled out' time before my radiotherapy starts on Tuesday 29th August.

The past 10 days

Tuesday 1st August - Thursday 10th August
Quite an uneventful few days as I had no appointments until Tuesday 8th August!
Tried to have as near to 'normal' time over the past few days, doing the things that Sam and I would usually have done during school holidays. It's been a bit strange because Reno has now changed to a night shift and sleeps until lunchtime. On Wednesday 2nd we called to see my manager at work to let him know how my treatment was going and also to say that it looks unlikely that I will be back to work before October. Then Sam and I did a bit of shopping followed by a lovely lunch at Notcutts!
On Thursday 3rd Sam had her driving test and I am pleased to say she passed! So now, although I can drive again, it's rather nice to be chauffeured around by Sam!! During the afternoon we went to the Suffolk Food Hall where I had arranged to meet a friend, (who I had not seen for around 35 years!) for tea and cake. It was lovely to catch up on what we had been doing on life's journey over the years.
On Saturday 5th we had Reno's brother and sister in law visit for a couple of hours, which was lovely and on Sunday we all got up early so that Sam could go on a beach hack from the equestrian centre at Hollesley through the countryside to Shingle Street along the beach and back again. Reno and I enjoyed the walk and watching Sam - the weather was perfect and we finished the morning off with a cream tea for lunch at Wyevale!!!
In myself I have been feeling very well although I still get some aches and pains from the area of my operation - the healing process internally, apparently, will take some time. I have now lost 5 fingernails in total and the other 5 look likely to follow suit quite soon - it will actually be a relief once they are all off as it is so easy to catch them whilst dressing etc. I feel like I should have shares in Elastoplast with the amount I am using!!! I have learnt though that using disposable gloves to do just about anything is quite useful! The tingling and numbness in my fingers and feet continues as does the sensation of feeling icy cold at times but I know this could last for a while yet!
On Tuesday 8th August I went for my CT scan in preparation for my radiotherapy treatment. The nurse called me through and we spoke for quite some time about the treatment, what exactly was going to happen and she asked me about my concerns. She also explained about the three 'dot markers' that would be tattooed either side of my rib cage and one in-between my breasts that would be permanent but tiny, so that the treatment would always be lined up and targeting the right area.
As I previously thought, tiredness is very common and the ribs can be weakened by the treatment so I just have to be aware of that in case I should fall on that side in the future! It is also essential to take care of the skin around the area the treatment will be given, by using aqueous cream and avoiding anything like deodorants that can irritate what may be already aggravated skin. My concerns for any affect on my heart were reassured as it was explained to me that once my Heart Scan is done on Friday 11th August the whole team will discuss the results along with the CT scan results and weigh up the risks against the benefits of the radiotherapy - should they feel that the risk on my heart is too great then the radiotherapy would be cancelled. I was assured that as I had already had chemotherapy and surgery and I have already had some of the doses of Herceptin, the recommended radiotherapy treatment would only be given if the benefits outweighed any risk.
We then went through to the scanner. It was very difficult and quite painful for me to put my left arm in the position that was required for the scan, however, because the radiographers need you to be comfortable they have all sorts of equipment and ways to get around any problems with restricted movement! They put a special pillow under my shoulders neck and head, asked me to raise my arms and put my hands on my head in a way that was comfortable to me and then extracted the air from the pillow which is now my 'mould' to use for the duration of my treatment. The actual scan then only took about 3-4 minutes. Once the scan was done the 'dot' tattoos were done - all I will say is those dots are the only time I will be tattooed! How people even endure an initial beats me and as for their whole arm or any other body part!.........I don't even want to think about it!!!! The garment I wore for the scan was then given to me to wear for each treatment and I was told that my first of the 15 treatments is scheduled for 29th August which means the final one will be 18th September.
Now I know the dates I can get myself focused for the next leg of this journey I have been on!!
Wednesday and Thursday have been 'just another day' pottering around!

No more wound checks!

Monday 24th July - Monday 31st July 2017
On Monday 24th I had another dose of Herceptin. Apparently I was supposed to have another heart scan first, but the nurse was straight onto it and the scan has now been arranged for Friday 11th August. The Herceptin injection was a real stinger this time but I think it has a lot to do with the speed at which it is put into my thigh! We then had a fairly quiet few days making sure I kept up with the daily walk and breast care exercises I was given - these are still a bit of a struggle but more because of my restricted veins than any discomfort from the operation. On Friday 28th I had another appointment at the breast clinic for the nurse to check how my wound has been doing since my last visit a week ago. Great news .........the wound needs no further checks and I am now ready to have the preparation C.T. scan for the radiotherapy! (The scan has been arranged for Tuesday 8th August!) The nurse has suggested that I use Bio Oil on and around the scar to get the skin in good condition and to aid the fading of the scar. Also I have been told that I can drive again, so long as I feel comfortable, which is great news! The nurse said it always helps you feel better if you can 'get your life back close to how it was before the cancer', and as I drove to Tesco, I felt so much better that this was one more thing that I didn't have to rely on someone else for. My only apprehension was applying and taking off the handbrake, but I needn't have been concerned - it was just fine!
We had a great weekend celebrating our wedding anniversary at the Miller and Carter Restaurant on Saturday evening and enjoying a cruise on the Orwell Lady, up the Orwell and just into Harwich harbour, whilst being served with a gorgeous buffet lunch on our way, to celebrate Reno's birthday. Even the weather held out for us which made the 4 hour round trip a real pleasure!
Today, Monday 31st, has been spent pottering about doing one or two household chores and smiling in the knowledge that I have a week that is appointment free!!!!