Tuesday 28.03.2017 - from Thursday last week until yesterday it's been all rest! Reno and Sam have been great as usual doing everything for me and waiting on me hand and foot insisting that I do nothing! Saturday I still felt really tired and washed out but on Sunday I felt much more awake, however, that wasn't my cue to 'carry on as normal' I realise that I need to rest further to build myself up ready for my next chemo. Yesterday I went into work from 9.00 a.m. - 2.15 p.m. and have informed them that I will only be at work on a Monday and Thursday from now on to see how it goes and then cutting back still further later on if necessary. I was tired again after work but that's expected really so I rested completely once back home - including an early night. Today I am at home and felt able to iron a few garments before spending the rest of the day (apart from the 6th form run!) with my feet up.
With regards to side affects, once again there are a few but nothing that is unbearable and as always I know that within about a week they will subside and I will be able to enjoy a restful holiday on the broads next week! My taste was not great at the weekend, not unbearable just distorted! A roast dinner looked so great on Mothers day but in reality it was a meal I knew I had to eat to build myself up (just like most meals at the moment!) Since Monday I have had a sore mouth and my throat feels like it is on fire! I am using the Difflam Mouth Wash which helps and enjoying Ice cream and mashed banana for breakfast! Bland foods are best really because they don't seem to leave a strange aftertaste for ages! Scrambled Egg is great and healthy too!
The strangest thing I have noticed is my sense of smell to some things is heightened and some smells seem to have got into my brain and I can't let them go! We have some automatic air fresheners at home which ordinarily I love - but at the moment they have all been switched off! I can smell them constantly and very strongly and they are awful! I can even taste them and during last night the smell was even strong in my pillows and bed linen to the point that this morning everything has been stripped from my bed and put into the washing machine - pillows and all!! When I last saw the oncologist he said that he had known some ladies to even throw away their favourite perfume! - hopefully my sense of smell will get back to normal so that I don't want to go to those extremes!
Tomorrow will be another restful day before work on Thursday!
Tuesday, 28 March 2017
Wednesday, 22 March 2017
Fourth Treatment - Halfway there - Hooray!!
The weekend was great! Lovely weather, the sun shone, we had a great time with friends and family and best of all I felt much better in myself though unusually tired. As a rule, just before my chemotherapy, I feel really well and full of beans!, however, this time the tiredness has been hanging around.
Monday 20th March - Dropped Sam at school and went to hospital for my routine blood test. Left with quite a sore arm as my vein just didn't want to part with any blood, but it gave in in the end!! Worked my normal day but as the day went on the flesh on the inside of my elbow joint felt quite tight and something below the skin was making it painful to try and fully straighten my arm. As it wasn't too big a problem to me managing day to day things I decided to speak with the hospital about it at my chemo appointment tomorrow.
Tuesday 21st March - Sam is coming to chemo with me today! My sister picked us up at 8.45a.m. and we made our way to the hospital and had the usual cuppa to settle a tiny bit of nerves! My appointment was at 10a.m. My nurse today was Mary - another chemotherapy angel! - we started with quite a long chat firstly about my arm and veins. I was relieved to hear Mary say that the problem with my arm not wanting to straighten is quite common and I need to keep it moving so that it doesn't cease completely. During my chemo Mary put a heated pad (at home I can use a hot water bottle or a warm towel) around my arm and after a while my movement was more free. The problem is caused by the veins constricting due to the chemicals I have and it can take months to get full movement back and it some cases it never returns so I now know how important it is to follow her advice and keep the heat treatment going 2-3 times a day. Once Mary started to administer the drugs she explained that she was using extra saline to try and help my veins, she also explained that when I start the next lot of four treatments in April I have the option of having a line put into my upper arm (this is done under ultra sound scan) which can be used instead of finding a good vein each time - however, Mary sees no problem with continuing using cannulas as she says my veins are relatively still in good condition compared to some patients. I think as long as I can I will persevere, as having a line in is a constant reminder and I am not sure I want that if we can avoid it.
Also had a bit of a wake up call today! Apparently my neutrophil count (determined in my blood test) was only just high enough for me to have my chemotherapy today (this explains why I have been so tired!) Mary tells me that I need much more rest and to make sure that I am drinking and eating plenty and has advised that I work less if I want to make sure that my treatments are not delayed by my count being too low! Everyone around me has been telling me the same thing about resting more but I have to admit when Mary said it, it really hit home and my count being low shocked me into really taking notice - no way do I want any treatments delayed!!!
Once chemo was finished Mary gave me the usual drugs and suggested starting the antibiotics two days early to give me a bit better chance of feeling well in time for our holiday 3rd April! Can't wait!!! Went home and put my feet up straight away! My sister stayed with Sam and I , cooked dinner and then spent the night here in case she was needed. I had an early night as I felt shattered!
Wednesday 22nd March - Managed to sleep through until 3.15a.m. then dozed through until 6.30a.m. Sam went off to school and my sister left for work at 9.50 a.m. knowing that Sam would be home again at 11.30a.m.
I am resting all day today with my feet up and just generally looking after myself creaming my nails (also important during treatment) and heat treating my arms! Also waiting for a call from my GP who is sorting a sick certificate for me to use as and when I am not at work as it looks like I will be cutting down from 4 days a week to a maximum of two days a week.
I really have had a wake up call from Mary yesterday and I will be taking more time to rest!
Monday 20th March - Dropped Sam at school and went to hospital for my routine blood test. Left with quite a sore arm as my vein just didn't want to part with any blood, but it gave in in the end!! Worked my normal day but as the day went on the flesh on the inside of my elbow joint felt quite tight and something below the skin was making it painful to try and fully straighten my arm. As it wasn't too big a problem to me managing day to day things I decided to speak with the hospital about it at my chemo appointment tomorrow.
Tuesday 21st March - Sam is coming to chemo with me today! My sister picked us up at 8.45a.m. and we made our way to the hospital and had the usual cuppa to settle a tiny bit of nerves! My appointment was at 10a.m. My nurse today was Mary - another chemotherapy angel! - we started with quite a long chat firstly about my arm and veins. I was relieved to hear Mary say that the problem with my arm not wanting to straighten is quite common and I need to keep it moving so that it doesn't cease completely. During my chemo Mary put a heated pad (at home I can use a hot water bottle or a warm towel) around my arm and after a while my movement was more free. The problem is caused by the veins constricting due to the chemicals I have and it can take months to get full movement back and it some cases it never returns so I now know how important it is to follow her advice and keep the heat treatment going 2-3 times a day. Once Mary started to administer the drugs she explained that she was using extra saline to try and help my veins, she also explained that when I start the next lot of four treatments in April I have the option of having a line put into my upper arm (this is done under ultra sound scan) which can be used instead of finding a good vein each time - however, Mary sees no problem with continuing using cannulas as she says my veins are relatively still in good condition compared to some patients. I think as long as I can I will persevere, as having a line in is a constant reminder and I am not sure I want that if we can avoid it.
Also had a bit of a wake up call today! Apparently my neutrophil count (determined in my blood test) was only just high enough for me to have my chemotherapy today (this explains why I have been so tired!) Mary tells me that I need much more rest and to make sure that I am drinking and eating plenty and has advised that I work less if I want to make sure that my treatments are not delayed by my count being too low! Everyone around me has been telling me the same thing about resting more but I have to admit when Mary said it, it really hit home and my count being low shocked me into really taking notice - no way do I want any treatments delayed!!!
Once chemo was finished Mary gave me the usual drugs and suggested starting the antibiotics two days early to give me a bit better chance of feeling well in time for our holiday 3rd April! Can't wait!!! Went home and put my feet up straight away! My sister stayed with Sam and I , cooked dinner and then spent the night here in case she was needed. I had an early night as I felt shattered!
Wednesday 22nd March - Managed to sleep through until 3.15a.m. then dozed through until 6.30a.m. Sam went off to school and my sister left for work at 9.50 a.m. knowing that Sam would be home again at 11.30a.m.
I am resting all day today with my feet up and just generally looking after myself creaming my nails (also important during treatment) and heat treating my arms! Also waiting for a call from my GP who is sorting a sick certificate for me to use as and when I am not at work as it looks like I will be cutting down from 4 days a week to a maximum of two days a week.
I really have had a wake up call from Mary yesterday and I will be taking more time to rest!
Friday, 17 March 2017
Ups and Downs
Friday 17th March - The past few days my emotions and how I feel in myself have been all over the place. Sometimes I have felt really good but others I have felt quite down and somewhat tearful. I can't really explain why but silly little things have upset me and if I am honest I have probably been a bit paranoid thinking that people keep staring at me! I think maybe I need to just pull myself together and get over myself! It has been quite a busy week and it's possible tiredness may be playing a big part as well as my arms, especially my right arm, which are quite painful still. I have come to the conclusion that its maybe not so much the muscles as the veins, I think they have reacted to the chemo and have formed a kind of scar tissue so that when I try and stretch my arm it feels like there is no give in them and it feels like if I keep stretching the part of my arm that hurts will snap! Hopefully I may get some answers as to whether this is the case when I go for my next chemo on Tuesday.
Anyway, as I said it has been a busy week - I have been to work everyday although I did leave off an hour and a half early on Thursday just because I felt really tired. On Tuesday evening there was a Spring Concert at Northgate and Sam was singing in the choir - I really could not miss that, Reno was disappointed he could not be there - so after dinner we set off to arrive there at 6.30 p.m. for a 7 o'clock start. It was brilliant and, along with mum who came too, really enjoyed the evening. We arrived home at 9.20 p.m. (probably the start of my down fall this week as I am usually in bed by then!) shattered but thankful that I managed to go - I even managed to record Sam's choir on my phone so Reno would be able to listen when he was home. After a good nights sleep I was ready for work on Wednesday and - I thought - a meeting being held at the school to inform parents all about what was required for applying to universities, applying for student loans, booking to view universities etc. etc.! I had already arranged for my sister to come with me to the meeting - I thought her brain would be more alert than mine, and I was right!- so we set off at 6.30p.m. for a 7 o'clock start. I took a note pad (knowing what my memory is like!) and although we were told that all the information would be on the school web site I thought it would be a good idea to note down key points! About fifteen minutes into the meeting I felt like all that was being said was going straight over the top of my head. I looked around me and everyone else seemed so attentive - I felt like a bad mother! - once again I tried to concentrate but it just wasn't happening! I looked at my sister as I started to note down something that was important and she just said "don't worry I have got it" and there she was making all the notes I could possibly need! I have said before that both my sisters are angels and I want to say it again - they really are ANGELS!. The meeting finished at about 8.15 p.m. but it felt much later! Once again I arrived home shattered, however, another good nights sleep followed! On Thursday I struggled a bit to keep focused at work so I made the decision to leave off early and go home to relax! Sam was spending the day in the public gallery at Crown Court so she didn't need to be picked up 'til about 4 p.m.
I got home put my feet up and decided to make some progress on my fruit bowl - I mean pretty hat!!!! So I beavered away with the TV on in the background until I was almost at the point of putting on the brim again - I felt really chuffed I had achieved so much in a relatively short space of time but then I tried it on...............OMG it was still not right........I think that the fact I have no hair is what's the problem !! but I thought I had made the correct adjustments after making the first one!! obviously not........I took a picture of it (just to prove I had almost finished it again you understand!!!) and promptly pulled it all out! Time to get Sam me thinks!!!!!! Once home again I made a start on hat number three (or fruit bowl - whichever the case may be) I will not give up! I swear I will have this hat done and looking pretty on my head, no..... perhaps not by Saturday.......but ready for our holiday Monday 3rd April!!!! Reno was home tonight, straight away he sensed I am not myself but didn't push for reasons - he knew I just needed his hugs. Sam and Reno are great at knowing just when I need someone to simply hold me tight.
Today I am spending some time with my mum but not so sure if I am going to be good company this morning tears fall when I least expect them and I have no real explanation. However I have tried my best to be cheerful whilst doing a bit of shopping and I keep looking forward to spending the weekend with Reno and Sam friends and family! On Saturday we are going to spend some time with our friends who will be cooking dinner for us and on Sunday we are going to Halesworth for 12 noon to spend some time with Reno's brother and sister in law who will also be cooking for us! What would we do without the weekends!!!
Anyway, as I said it has been a busy week - I have been to work everyday although I did leave off an hour and a half early on Thursday just because I felt really tired. On Tuesday evening there was a Spring Concert at Northgate and Sam was singing in the choir - I really could not miss that, Reno was disappointed he could not be there - so after dinner we set off to arrive there at 6.30 p.m. for a 7 o'clock start. It was brilliant and, along with mum who came too, really enjoyed the evening. We arrived home at 9.20 p.m. (probably the start of my down fall this week as I am usually in bed by then!) shattered but thankful that I managed to go - I even managed to record Sam's choir on my phone so Reno would be able to listen when he was home. After a good nights sleep I was ready for work on Wednesday and - I thought - a meeting being held at the school to inform parents all about what was required for applying to universities, applying for student loans, booking to view universities etc. etc.! I had already arranged for my sister to come with me to the meeting - I thought her brain would be more alert than mine, and I was right!- so we set off at 6.30p.m. for a 7 o'clock start. I took a note pad (knowing what my memory is like!) and although we were told that all the information would be on the school web site I thought it would be a good idea to note down key points! About fifteen minutes into the meeting I felt like all that was being said was going straight over the top of my head. I looked around me and everyone else seemed so attentive - I felt like a bad mother! - once again I tried to concentrate but it just wasn't happening! I looked at my sister as I started to note down something that was important and she just said "don't worry I have got it" and there she was making all the notes I could possibly need! I have said before that both my sisters are angels and I want to say it again - they really are ANGELS!. The meeting finished at about 8.15 p.m. but it felt much later! Once again I arrived home shattered, however, another good nights sleep followed! On Thursday I struggled a bit to keep focused at work so I made the decision to leave off early and go home to relax! Sam was spending the day in the public gallery at Crown Court so she didn't need to be picked up 'til about 4 p.m.
I got home put my feet up and decided to make some progress on my fruit bowl - I mean pretty hat!!!! So I beavered away with the TV on in the background until I was almost at the point of putting on the brim again - I felt really chuffed I had achieved so much in a relatively short space of time but then I tried it on...............OMG it was still not right........I think that the fact I have no hair is what's the problem !! but I thought I had made the correct adjustments after making the first one!! obviously not........I took a picture of it (just to prove I had almost finished it again you understand!!!) and promptly pulled it all out! Time to get Sam me thinks!!!!!! Once home again I made a start on hat number three (or fruit bowl - whichever the case may be) I will not give up! I swear I will have this hat done and looking pretty on my head, no..... perhaps not by Saturday.......but ready for our holiday Monday 3rd April!!!! Reno was home tonight, straight away he sensed I am not myself but didn't push for reasons - he knew I just needed his hugs. Sam and Reno are great at knowing just when I need someone to simply hold me tight.
Today I am spending some time with my mum but not so sure if I am going to be good company this morning tears fall when I least expect them and I have no real explanation. However I have tried my best to be cheerful whilst doing a bit of shopping and I keep looking forward to spending the weekend with Reno and Sam friends and family! On Saturday we are going to spend some time with our friends who will be cooking dinner for us and on Sunday we are going to Halesworth for 12 noon to spend some time with Reno's brother and sister in law who will also be cooking for us! What would we do without the weekends!!!
Monday, 13 March 2017
Hat or Fruit Bowl?!?!
Monday 13th March 2017 - The past few days (Thursday - today) have had some trying times, satisfying times along with some laughs too!!
From Wednesday to Saturday my mouth has been more sore as time went on until I felt like I was living on ice-cream and stewed apple!! No complaints - ice cream for breakfast was quite a luxury I felt! I managed to get some advice from a chemist who recommended Difflam Sore Throat Rinse, saying that it would help if I rinsed my mouth with it - and , to a point it did, as after each rinse it stopped the painfulness for about half an hour before it crept back again. However I continued with it every couple of hours, right through until Sunday when , thankfully, I woke up with my mouth feeling much better - I could even stick my tongue out! (something I hadn't been able to do for a few days as it was so sore.) I guess really some things just have to take their course and you just have to bear with it! Anyway, lets get all the low points out of the way ! My right arm is really still quite painful and I cannot reach round the back of me at all with that arm, the left isn't quite so bad but lets just say I know my limits with both!! I was hoping that they would be feeling much better by now but as yet its not to be!
Friday I had a day to myself (useful because I didn't really want to talk as moving my tongue around hurt!). This may seem strange but I did quite a lot of housework and thoroughly enjoyed it - yes I know I have turned quite mad! It's so long since I felt like making the effort and Reno and Sam bless them, have been keeping on top of things for me. I felt satisfied that the house looked clean and tidy due to the effort I had put in rather than having to rely on someone else and yes I will say it again - It was really satisfying! I still managed to sit down for an hour and a half before I collected Sam so I picked up my crocheting to see if I could make some more progress on the 'pretty' hat with a brim that I was making! Once Sam was home she took one look at it and laughing,said it looked like a fruit bowl! I wasn't going to be discouraged and continued to crochet creating the brim and eventually finishing it. It looked huge! I put it on and Sam laughed and laughed "Mum - Its too big" she giggled. I went to look in the mirror and I was giggling too - it really was comical, if I didn't have a head that acted like Velcro you could have spun the hat round by the brim and I am sure it would have turned several times. I decided that it would have to be pulled out and started again with a few adjustments, but before that I decided to take a selfie so that Reno could see the proof that I had actually finished it (you see - I started a babies shawl nearly 30 years ago and its still on-going!) I struck a pose and eventually took the picture on my phone only to discover whilst looking at it that what I had actually taken was a video clip that was still running - needless to say Sam just fell about laughing - and so did I - chemo brain or what!!!
The weekend was lovely weather and by Sunday I was feeling really good - not too tired and more like my usual self. All ready for work on Monday.
Nothing different at work today - I am feeling pretty good and looking forward to a restful evening - and starting the fruit bowl - I mean - hat all over again - I am determined to finish it by the weekend!
From Wednesday to Saturday my mouth has been more sore as time went on until I felt like I was living on ice-cream and stewed apple!! No complaints - ice cream for breakfast was quite a luxury I felt! I managed to get some advice from a chemist who recommended Difflam Sore Throat Rinse, saying that it would help if I rinsed my mouth with it - and , to a point it did, as after each rinse it stopped the painfulness for about half an hour before it crept back again. However I continued with it every couple of hours, right through until Sunday when , thankfully, I woke up with my mouth feeling much better - I could even stick my tongue out! (something I hadn't been able to do for a few days as it was so sore.) I guess really some things just have to take their course and you just have to bear with it! Anyway, lets get all the low points out of the way ! My right arm is really still quite painful and I cannot reach round the back of me at all with that arm, the left isn't quite so bad but lets just say I know my limits with both!! I was hoping that they would be feeling much better by now but as yet its not to be!
Friday I had a day to myself (useful because I didn't really want to talk as moving my tongue around hurt!). This may seem strange but I did quite a lot of housework and thoroughly enjoyed it - yes I know I have turned quite mad! It's so long since I felt like making the effort and Reno and Sam bless them, have been keeping on top of things for me. I felt satisfied that the house looked clean and tidy due to the effort I had put in rather than having to rely on someone else and yes I will say it again - It was really satisfying! I still managed to sit down for an hour and a half before I collected Sam so I picked up my crocheting to see if I could make some more progress on the 'pretty' hat with a brim that I was making! Once Sam was home she took one look at it and laughing,said it looked like a fruit bowl! I wasn't going to be discouraged and continued to crochet creating the brim and eventually finishing it. It looked huge! I put it on and Sam laughed and laughed "Mum - Its too big" she giggled. I went to look in the mirror and I was giggling too - it really was comical, if I didn't have a head that acted like Velcro you could have spun the hat round by the brim and I am sure it would have turned several times. I decided that it would have to be pulled out and started again with a few adjustments, but before that I decided to take a selfie so that Reno could see the proof that I had actually finished it (you see - I started a babies shawl nearly 30 years ago and its still on-going!) I struck a pose and eventually took the picture on my phone only to discover whilst looking at it that what I had actually taken was a video clip that was still running - needless to say Sam just fell about laughing - and so did I - chemo brain or what!!!
The weekend was lovely weather and by Sunday I was feeling really good - not too tired and more like my usual self. All ready for work on Monday.
Nothing different at work today - I am feeling pretty good and looking forward to a restful evening - and starting the fruit bowl - I mean - hat all over again - I am determined to finish it by the weekend!
Wednesday, 8 March 2017
The Past few days
Saturday 4th March - Woke feeling really tired today, so I knew that I was going to have to pace myself a little! Went shopping during the morning but when I returned home was more tired than I could have imagined! Had lunch and spent the rest of the day resting and sleeping on and off in bed! I felt really lazy but had to acknowledge that I actually felt better for giving in and resting! Enjoyed a relaxing bath before dinner and then put my feet up in front of the TV for the rest of the evening with Reno and Sam!
Sunday 5th March - Decided to go to church this morning and my sister kindly offered to come with me so that I didn't have to drive and Reno could take Sam for some practise driving before her next lesson tomorrow! The church was packed as there was a christening and I was a little overwhelmed and emotional as several people came over to see me - also I was still feeling really tired and today my muscles in my arms have started to ache which I think impacted on how emotional I felt. I enjoyed the service and returned home for lunch and to prepare dinner so that we could all relax and watch a film together before my mother arrived for dinner. Reno had to go to Felixstowe ready for an early start on Monday so Sam and I had an early night!
Monday 6th March - Felt quite exhausted after my shower today, just as if I had done a days work already! (Poor old lady!!!) and my shoulders, elbows and muscles in my arms are really quite painful. I know this is a symptom of the chemo so I try to ignore it as much as possible although the pain in my right arm makes it difficult! Went to work as planned which helps as it takes my mind off exactly how I am feeling. Made the effort and visited some friends after work before returning home for a relaxing evening not doing anything much except a jigsaw puzzle with Sam!
Tuesday 7th March - Not a very good night last night - unfortunately the pain in my arm joints and muscles is almost unbearable especially in certain positions (trying to wash behind me, if you know what I mean, is so painful it brings tears to my eyes) but I am thankful that at least the pain hasn't spread to my legs (which it did after the second dose of chemo) and I know that after 4 or 5 days it will ease and disappear altogether. I decide to keep thinking positive and go into work as planned. By 9.30 a.m. however, I rang the surgery to get a telephone appointment with the doctor to ask if they could suggest what I should do to try and ease the pain - every movement of my arms was causing me such pain that even work was no longer a distraction, the surgery told me a doctor would ring me back at some point during the day - I decided to carry on at work at least until I heard from them. The doctor rang at 2.30 p.m. and told me what pain relief and anti inflammatory tablets to take to help me and said that if there was no improvement in 24 hours I was to ring her back. After collecting Sam from school I took some tablets as recommended by the doctor and then climbed into a hot bath which proved to be most helpful too - the warmth around my muscles and joints made such a difference and by the time I got out of the bath I felt more like my old (young!) self again - I even managed to prepare and cook dinner for Sam and Reno! - It's rare for Reno to be home during the week but his lorry was in for a service - when I think about it God works in mysterious ways - of all the nights I felt like I needed Reno at home , it was tonight! Went to bed feeling better that the tablets were working and the pain was now not nearly so bad. Lets hope tomorrow brings a better day!
Wednesday 8th March - Had a fairly good night! However I have decided that I am not going to work today - instead I am going to have a more restful day so that hopefully I can return to work on Thursday. The tablets are keeping my pain at bay, which is good, and hopefully after a couple of days I will no longer need to take the pain relief. Thankfully the pain has not spread to any other joints, however..........wait for it........today my mouth is a bit sore! I am not shocked by it or alarmed as it is another symptom!! I can still eat, drink and talk (thank goodness!!!!) I just find it less sore if I try and keep my tongue as still as possible!! The side of my tongue is quite red and there is a blister which feels just like a bead behind my back tooth! Just as well I am staying at home today - only poor Sam who has a short school day today has to listen to me having a tiny grumble!!! It works well really - on a short day Sam spends a lot of time in her room studying - she's more than happy to escape to her room to study if I am having a little grumble!!!! Seriously though Sam doesn't complain - she's a gem!
Sunday 5th March - Decided to go to church this morning and my sister kindly offered to come with me so that I didn't have to drive and Reno could take Sam for some practise driving before her next lesson tomorrow! The church was packed as there was a christening and I was a little overwhelmed and emotional as several people came over to see me - also I was still feeling really tired and today my muscles in my arms have started to ache which I think impacted on how emotional I felt. I enjoyed the service and returned home for lunch and to prepare dinner so that we could all relax and watch a film together before my mother arrived for dinner. Reno had to go to Felixstowe ready for an early start on Monday so Sam and I had an early night!
Monday 6th March - Felt quite exhausted after my shower today, just as if I had done a days work already! (Poor old lady!!!) and my shoulders, elbows and muscles in my arms are really quite painful. I know this is a symptom of the chemo so I try to ignore it as much as possible although the pain in my right arm makes it difficult! Went to work as planned which helps as it takes my mind off exactly how I am feeling. Made the effort and visited some friends after work before returning home for a relaxing evening not doing anything much except a jigsaw puzzle with Sam!
Tuesday 7th March - Not a very good night last night - unfortunately the pain in my arm joints and muscles is almost unbearable especially in certain positions (trying to wash behind me, if you know what I mean, is so painful it brings tears to my eyes) but I am thankful that at least the pain hasn't spread to my legs (which it did after the second dose of chemo) and I know that after 4 or 5 days it will ease and disappear altogether. I decide to keep thinking positive and go into work as planned. By 9.30 a.m. however, I rang the surgery to get a telephone appointment with the doctor to ask if they could suggest what I should do to try and ease the pain - every movement of my arms was causing me such pain that even work was no longer a distraction, the surgery told me a doctor would ring me back at some point during the day - I decided to carry on at work at least until I heard from them. The doctor rang at 2.30 p.m. and told me what pain relief and anti inflammatory tablets to take to help me and said that if there was no improvement in 24 hours I was to ring her back. After collecting Sam from school I took some tablets as recommended by the doctor and then climbed into a hot bath which proved to be most helpful too - the warmth around my muscles and joints made such a difference and by the time I got out of the bath I felt more like my old (young!) self again - I even managed to prepare and cook dinner for Sam and Reno! - It's rare for Reno to be home during the week but his lorry was in for a service - when I think about it God works in mysterious ways - of all the nights I felt like I needed Reno at home , it was tonight! Went to bed feeling better that the tablets were working and the pain was now not nearly so bad. Lets hope tomorrow brings a better day!
Wednesday 8th March - Had a fairly good night! However I have decided that I am not going to work today - instead I am going to have a more restful day so that hopefully I can return to work on Thursday. The tablets are keeping my pain at bay, which is good, and hopefully after a couple of days I will no longer need to take the pain relief. Thankfully the pain has not spread to any other joints, however..........wait for it........today my mouth is a bit sore! I am not shocked by it or alarmed as it is another symptom!! I can still eat, drink and talk (thank goodness!!!!) I just find it less sore if I try and keep my tongue as still as possible!! The side of my tongue is quite red and there is a blister which feels just like a bead behind my back tooth! Just as well I am staying at home today - only poor Sam who has a short school day today has to listen to me having a tiny grumble!!! It works well really - on a short day Sam spends a lot of time in her room studying - she's more than happy to escape to her room to study if I am having a little grumble!!!! Seriously though Sam doesn't complain - she's a gem!
Friday, 3 March 2017
Great News!
Thursday 2nd March - Took Sam to school and shopped for our evening meal then waited at home for my friend to arrive who was coming with me for my scan and oncologist appointments. My friend arrived good and early so we set off as I knew how horrendous it would be to park at the hospital - and I was right!!! However we still had time to grab a quick coffee before my first appointment for the ultra sound scan. We waited a short while in the waiting room and then we were called through for the scan - I have been waiting for this as my hopes were that I would be able to see that the tumour has shrunk! I got ready and the doctor came in and started to scan - "it's shrunk" she said "by 6mm" OMG I was thrilled and really quite emotional. The doctor explained that when you look at how much volume of tissue 6mm is in a tumour that is quite a chunk! The treatment - tough though it is at times - is working and if it's working I don't mind how tough it gets. I asked the doctor to check the lymph nodes under my arm just to make sure there was still no sign of cancer there as far as she could tell and this she did saying it still looked fine. Now for my next request! Could I have a copy of the images so that I could show Reno and Sam and they could see the difference too? The doctor told me that if I asked at the reception desk within the department that could be arranged. Wonderful! So I got dressed and did just that - the receptionist said she thought I would have to put my request in writing and it may take a little while but she would check if we didn't mind waiting! After a few minutes she came back and said the lady who dealt with the requests would download the images onto a disc if I could wait about 10 minutes and if I had some ID - I didn't have any ID so the receptionist kindly printed off a hospital letter for me to prove my address - how kind was that!! I couldn't believe that I was going to be able to have the disc today - there was a fee of £10.00 but it will be worth every penny to be able to show Reno and Sam - I have decided I am not going to look at them until Reno comes home at the weekend! After about 15 minutes the lady concerned came into the department with my disc and a form for me to sign - she was lovely and said that she knew how I felt about wanting the images and she wished me all the best with my treatment saying that she too had had breast cancer a couple of years ago! It's incredible how many people have been affected by cancer - you don't really realise until it happens to you and people then share that fact with you - it's really quite amazing. With my disc in my bag, my friend and I went to find something for lunch before my next appointment with the oncologist at 1.45 p.m.
My appointment soon came its amazing how time flies when you have someone to chat with! I didn't see Dr Ram today but another doctor whose name escapes me - chemo brain apparently!! - who works alongside Dr Ram. He asked me how I felt, what chemo symptoms I had experienced, how work was going and was pleased that I seem to be coping rather well with the treatment! On reviewing my scan and notes he was pleased to see that the tumour had shrunk and agreed that all seemed to be going well. My treatment plan (four chemo doses - of which I have now had three - followed by a further four three weeks apart) would stay as planned which I was pleased about as I have all the dates booked in! The doctor then talked to me about the second lot of four telling me some of the symptoms I could expect - nothing is certain of course but at least I am aware of them, I don't want to talk about them now because I am really not interested in them unless they happen! Then he talked a little about what will happen once the chemotherapy is over and I have surgery. It has given me a few things to be considering and giving some thought to. Apparently if my whole breast is removed as well as 1 or 2 lymph nodes then I won't require radiotherapy but if I only have some of the breast removed with the lymph nodes (which they have to check for cancer cells) I will definitely have to have radiotherapy treatment. Obviously I want to take time to think about how I really feel about it all and look into side effects of radiotherapy etc. before I make any decisions. Its easy to say take my whole breast but then when I really start to think I'm not sure how I really really feel about it, obviously I will also be guided by the doctor and surgeon as to what they feel is best but for the time being it gives me food for thought! No further appointment necessary for the oncologist until 8 weeks time! 27th April. Unless of course I need to see them sooner should the 1st dose of my second lot of four give me any problems - which of course it won't 'cos I CAN DO THIS!!!!
My friend and I then left the hospital to collect Sam and go home for a cuppa! What a good day it has been with such GREAT NEWS! Spent the rest of the afternoon and evening resting ready for a busy day at work tomorrow!
Friday 3rd March - Have felt a bit below par today quite tired and my taste is not so good but I have still been to work to complete the accounts month end procedures as this takes my mind off me! However still buzzing from yesterdays news so all in all a fair day! Collected Sam and once home went to bed for a nap - woke in time to see Sam off to horse riding with my sister and prepare dinner ready for when Reno and Sam arrive home at about 7.45p.m. Looking forward to a restful weekend (mostly with my feet up!)and to sharing the images of my scan with my wonderful husband and daughter - I love them sooooooo much.
My appointment soon came its amazing how time flies when you have someone to chat with! I didn't see Dr Ram today but another doctor whose name escapes me - chemo brain apparently!! - who works alongside Dr Ram. He asked me how I felt, what chemo symptoms I had experienced, how work was going and was pleased that I seem to be coping rather well with the treatment! On reviewing my scan and notes he was pleased to see that the tumour had shrunk and agreed that all seemed to be going well. My treatment plan (four chemo doses - of which I have now had three - followed by a further four three weeks apart) would stay as planned which I was pleased about as I have all the dates booked in! The doctor then talked to me about the second lot of four telling me some of the symptoms I could expect - nothing is certain of course but at least I am aware of them, I don't want to talk about them now because I am really not interested in them unless they happen! Then he talked a little about what will happen once the chemotherapy is over and I have surgery. It has given me a few things to be considering and giving some thought to. Apparently if my whole breast is removed as well as 1 or 2 lymph nodes then I won't require radiotherapy but if I only have some of the breast removed with the lymph nodes (which they have to check for cancer cells) I will definitely have to have radiotherapy treatment. Obviously I want to take time to think about how I really feel about it all and look into side effects of radiotherapy etc. before I make any decisions. Its easy to say take my whole breast but then when I really start to think I'm not sure how I really really feel about it, obviously I will also be guided by the doctor and surgeon as to what they feel is best but for the time being it gives me food for thought! No further appointment necessary for the oncologist until 8 weeks time! 27th April. Unless of course I need to see them sooner should the 1st dose of my second lot of four give me any problems - which of course it won't 'cos I CAN DO THIS!!!!
My friend and I then left the hospital to collect Sam and go home for a cuppa! What a good day it has been with such GREAT NEWS! Spent the rest of the afternoon and evening resting ready for a busy day at work tomorrow!
Friday 3rd March - Have felt a bit below par today quite tired and my taste is not so good but I have still been to work to complete the accounts month end procedures as this takes my mind off me! However still buzzing from yesterdays news so all in all a fair day! Collected Sam and once home went to bed for a nap - woke in time to see Sam off to horse riding with my sister and prepare dinner ready for when Reno and Sam arrive home at about 7.45p.m. Looking forward to a restful weekend (mostly with my feet up!)and to sharing the images of my scan with my wonderful husband and daughter - I love them sooooooo much.
Wednesday, 1 March 2017
3rd Chemotherapy Treatment
Monday 27th February - Went for my blood test this morning ready for my Chemotherapy tomorrow, really quick! In and out of the hospital within 15 mins! Went onto work as usual and I am glad I have work as a distraction as feeling rather anxious about tomorrow though I can't really say why. Work went well as can be expected - collected Sam and then went home to do one or two chores knowing that today will be the only day this week now that I get to do anything much at home! Had a restful evening and early night!
Tuesday 28th February - My sister arrived at 8.00a.m. to take Sam to school and me to the hospital for treatment. Arrived at hospital early so we were able to park reasonably easily and go for a coffee to try and make me feel less anxious! I still can't put my finger on why I feel this way this time only perhaps that I still have a really sore vein from the first dose although there were no problems after the second - who knows!!! We arrived in the oncology department at 9.50 a.m. ready for my 10.00a.m. appointment - I was first of all weighed (this is to ensure that my weight doesn't fluctuate too much which could affect the dosage I am given) and then told that Hayley would be looking after me in Bay 1. We made ourselves comfortable as we could until Hayley came over to insert my cannula - this is never a comfortable procedure but today I felt really emotional and was quite weepy, again I really am not sure why - it may be because I am more tired than usual. Once the saline drip was set up Hayley began to slowly feed in the syringes of drugs at first I was worried because the drugs seemed to be going in much quicker than normal and this concerned me as the first two syringes have a drug which can burn the vein and skin (which appears to be why my vein is so sore from the first time). It had been explained to me before that this is why it all has to be done slowly however, Hayley reassured me that everything was fine and the reason the flow was so quick was that the vein was a particularly good one and there really was no problem! My dose of chemotherapy was done in 35 mins and after being issued with my usual anti sickness pills and antibiotics we left by 11.20 a.m.! As usual I felt really tired but we decided to pop and get things for dinner then once I was home I could just put my feet up - and I did just that! During lunchtime I had a courtesy call from a doctor at my surgery! The Dr said that he just wanted to make sure that I was ok in light of my recent problems, was there anything the surgery could do for me and did I have the support around me I needed. I was amazed as I really hadn't expected to hear from the surgery until I was referred back to them after my treatment was completed. I told the doctor I was really grateful for the call and I would contact them should I need anything at all - he was really lovely and so helpful telling me that if I want or need to be signed off work I only need to let them know. It just goes to show that when we really need our NHS they are there for us. Collected Sam later in the afternoon and then back home with my feet up! My sister cooked a lovely stir-fry for dinner and after a dozy evening I went to bed at 9 a.m. taking comfort in the knowledge that my sister was staying the night and there if Sam or I needed her.
Wednesday 1st March - Not had a good night at all! Awake from 2.15 a.m. - 4.30 a.m. but then managed another hours sleep - however, I am not complaining as although I feel a bit nauseas and tired I have not been sick and I can sleep most of the day which is just what I intend to do - whether it works out that way is another thing! My sister stayed until 10.20 a.m. and I am having a restful day - Sam returned home at 11.30 today and is looking after me in between studying - she's an angel bless her. Looking forward to a restful rest of the day, a good nights sleep and my scan and visit to my oncologist tomorrow!
Tuesday 28th February - My sister arrived at 8.00a.m. to take Sam to school and me to the hospital for treatment. Arrived at hospital early so we were able to park reasonably easily and go for a coffee to try and make me feel less anxious! I still can't put my finger on why I feel this way this time only perhaps that I still have a really sore vein from the first dose although there were no problems after the second - who knows!!! We arrived in the oncology department at 9.50 a.m. ready for my 10.00a.m. appointment - I was first of all weighed (this is to ensure that my weight doesn't fluctuate too much which could affect the dosage I am given) and then told that Hayley would be looking after me in Bay 1. We made ourselves comfortable as we could until Hayley came over to insert my cannula - this is never a comfortable procedure but today I felt really emotional and was quite weepy, again I really am not sure why - it may be because I am more tired than usual. Once the saline drip was set up Hayley began to slowly feed in the syringes of drugs at first I was worried because the drugs seemed to be going in much quicker than normal and this concerned me as the first two syringes have a drug which can burn the vein and skin (which appears to be why my vein is so sore from the first time). It had been explained to me before that this is why it all has to be done slowly however, Hayley reassured me that everything was fine and the reason the flow was so quick was that the vein was a particularly good one and there really was no problem! My dose of chemotherapy was done in 35 mins and after being issued with my usual anti sickness pills and antibiotics we left by 11.20 a.m.! As usual I felt really tired but we decided to pop and get things for dinner then once I was home I could just put my feet up - and I did just that! During lunchtime I had a courtesy call from a doctor at my surgery! The Dr said that he just wanted to make sure that I was ok in light of my recent problems, was there anything the surgery could do for me and did I have the support around me I needed. I was amazed as I really hadn't expected to hear from the surgery until I was referred back to them after my treatment was completed. I told the doctor I was really grateful for the call and I would contact them should I need anything at all - he was really lovely and so helpful telling me that if I want or need to be signed off work I only need to let them know. It just goes to show that when we really need our NHS they are there for us. Collected Sam later in the afternoon and then back home with my feet up! My sister cooked a lovely stir-fry for dinner and after a dozy evening I went to bed at 9 a.m. taking comfort in the knowledge that my sister was staying the night and there if Sam or I needed her.
Wednesday 1st March - Not had a good night at all! Awake from 2.15 a.m. - 4.30 a.m. but then managed another hours sleep - however, I am not complaining as although I feel a bit nauseas and tired I have not been sick and I can sleep most of the day which is just what I intend to do - whether it works out that way is another thing! My sister stayed until 10.20 a.m. and I am having a restful day - Sam returned home at 11.30 today and is looking after me in between studying - she's an angel bless her. Looking forward to a restful rest of the day, a good nights sleep and my scan and visit to my oncologist tomorrow!
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